Friday, September 30, 2011

Desi?




People often ask me if I am a Latina. This usually just ends up pissing me off for a couple of reasons. Firstly, because they often don't seem to believe me when I say I'm not, as if I would lie about it. Secondly, I don't actually look Hispanic, and the only people who insist that I do are just white midwesterners who can't tell brown people apart anyway.

THAT SAID,

Look at this Ricky Ricardo looking guy! He DOES look a little espanish, no? My grandfather. A 2nd generation American of German heritage only. I guess I have to add, Allegedly.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

BREAKING NEWS

I just made the connection that Sylvia Sidney, adorable babyface from City Streets (1931):


= Juno in Beetlejuice.


The 20s and 30s are exploding with cute-baby bee-stung-lipped actresses in finger waves, but Sylvia Sidney was the preciousest of them all.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Feeling bloodthirsty this morning, grandmother?

-- Not any more than usual, dear!

Thieves Fall Out - 1941

I love this movie! It's not available for purchase anywhere - I might never see it again!

Jane Darwell is an incredible comedic actress. She's hilarious. I'm not sure why this is such an unknown movie because the writing is perfect and the acting is such high quality. WTF mate?

Jane Darwell is most famous (to me) for playing bitch neighbor Mrs. Merriwether in Gone with the Wind. I guess she was in The Grapes of Wrath also. She serves the purpose in a dramatic role, but she belongs there about as much as Alec Baldwin does.


FAK!

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Activities

I learned to play hoop & stick today. "Research" re: partying like it's 1899 (and you're underage). I quickly gave up in favor of not chasing the hoop into traffic. This game is like, totally hard.

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Actually,

Kate Beaton on Historical Accuracy:

"You do sacrifice some facts for the sake of a joke. I find myself trying to circumvent any objections. One comic I did recently was about Danton and Robespierre. I drew Robespierre at Danton's trial -- which he was not. He was sick, so he wasn't there. But the comic was about their relationship, and he was responsible, so I drew him in there. I had to put at the top, "He wasn't there, I know, but anyway ..." Otherwise, inevitably, an email titled "Actually" will appear in my inbox."

from this Salon interview. I love how much play she's getting! Maybe everyone isn't retarded? Not sure.

I have to come to terms with a finer accuracy, or find an official position. I waffle based on what I want to get out of something. I find it amusing to slightly manipulate things once in a while to suit a joke or my own impression of things, but I can't knowingly perpetuate falsehoods. Because next thing you know, you're just writing historical fiction about what would happen if Mary Shelley married Lestat de Lioncourt (yoooou know!), and I can't be havin with that shit.

Historical fiction is for when you're 15 in detention (Andrei Codrescu - The Blood Countess) but then it's time to move on. If you're me. No judgement!

Hey.

Get off that.

Oscar Wilde as paraphrased by Stephen Fry


Oscar Wilde composed this parable at a dinner party in response to a catty and back-biting conversation that had arisen.

"The devil was walking one day in the Libyan desert when he saw a couple of young demons who were tormenting a monk. He went up and asked, 'What goes on here?' They turned and bowed to their master, and they said, 'Well, thirty nine days and thirty nine nights we have tried to bring this man away from his God and his Church.'
'We've tried to make him turn towards you, Lord.'
'We've offered him powers and principalities.'
'We've given him delights of the flesh.'
'We have offered him wisdom and knowledge.'
'In all these he has steadfastly refused, staying firm to his God and his Christ.'
And Satan said, 'Out of the way.' He lent forward and whispered in the ear of the monk, who immediately filled the air with the most terrible curses, snapped his wooden cross in twain, and shrieked implications against his God and his Church and Christ and his Heavenly Father.
And the demons bowed down before Satan and said, 'Truly, you are the Lord. How can you have done this so quickly when we took thirty nine days and thirty nine nights and made no impression? What did you say to him?'

The Devil said, 'But it was very simple; I told him his brother had been made Bishop of Alexandria.'"
--

*** if i wrote this, this is the part where i'd add "ZING!" all caps, small font.

Friday, September 23, 2011

Pet Peeve

When cover artists change the gender of the subject of a song to suit their own sexuality.

Example: the Bat for Lashes cover of "I'm on Fire" in which "hey little girl" becomes "hey little boy".

Don't worry young fool, it's not exactly going to start a big LESBIAN RUMOR if you leave the song as it is! For chrissake. It's annoying that people need to frantically organize everything so it all looks on the up & up re: social norms, and it's also frankly a little off-putting to hear a grown woman coo to a "little boy" in a song. Women don't tend to fetishize their male quarries as little boys, or didn't anyone notice? To me, it becomes a completely different animal when you swap the gender.

In fact! why don't we leave the covers to Tori. Yes, let's. Anyone who can make you shed a tear while covering a Kylie Minogue dance classic pretty much has it handled.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

god, AND

Major sidebar. I need to write more about how really personally involved people (women) get in the lives of certain historical personages. I have noticed this most with:

Catherine of Aragon
Anne Boleyn
Abigail Adams***

People are talking about these women like they were their next door neighbors.

I once stumbled upon a website that was serving as a weird memorial/shrine to Abigail Adams. There was an animated gif "eternal flame" followed by THOUSANDS OF comments and notes which were all personally addressed to her in a very familiar way. Like a patron saint. It's weird, completely unexpected, but at least they're idolizing someone who warranted it instead of an actual saint of made-up virtue.

This is just a personal memo for later. Major thesis forthcoming about the people out there who refer to Catherine of Aragon as "my girl Cat."

In case you were wondering

...Where I stand on the Elizabeth I locket ring. I think it might NOT be Anne. The girl in the portrait looks fair, and Anne was unequivocally famous for her dark hair and darker eyes. Her olive skin was much noted in a day when the standard of beauty was firmly in favor of ultra white skin and other Aryan features. There's no reason to believe she would ever have been portrayed otherwise, even after death.

Is it too strange to think that Elizabeth could have been honoring someone else? Even her bitch sister Mary seems to resemble the portrait (as a girl) more than AB. Not that I would expect Elizabeth to feel emotionally beholden to Mary, but she had far more of a relationship with her.

Anyway, just muddying the waters, it could very well be Anne. I'm sure Elizabeth had issues.


Close-up of the portrait thought to be Anne.

The ring was removed from Elizabeth's finger when she died. She apparently wore it faithfully for about 25 or 30 years after its commission in the 1570s. I believe the locket aspect of the ring was generally unknown until she died, but I'm not digging sources up PERSONAL BLOG = secondhand information is a go. This isn't the news!

One thing I love about situations in which crucial details are lost forever is that you are absolutely unable to not wager your own hilarious opinions about what happened.

Usually the hypotheses of other people just piss me off, but I love to see people interested in convoluted historical interpersonal drama. And translating it in their own retarded vernacular. Kind of like I do. While casually reading as you do about Catherine of Aragon and her claim that she was the rightful queen to Henry VIII because she had never consummated her prior marriage with his brother Arthur, who died, I read this comment:

"i dont understand this queen. her and arthur, didnt a queen and king consumate there marriage the night after there married. unless something was up."

Excellent sleuthing! Surely something indeed WAS UP! Can't fault the girl, she quickly arrived at a 500 year old debate that still roils among Tudor biographers. But wait, how does she know what "consummate" means when she still doesn't have their/there in order?

****
ETA: I take it back. Looking at the ring again, it does totally look like Anne Boleyn. It's still an awesome ring/story.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

My new favorite tumblr

The daily travails of a lesbian construction worker in New York. Or as she puts it, "The deranged experiences of a queer woman in a male-dominated industry."

Male readers may be put off by her generally sharpened and critical view of the men she encounters, but get real, buddies: a woman (a gay one!) living that far off the grid of accepted female behavior/careers is going to receive the most asinine, outrageous, pathetic commentary from the men she has to work with. Shit they wouldn't have the courage to say to each other, yet they feel emboldened and entitled to with her.

The types discussed aren't salt-of-the-earth workaday dudes. They're assholes who actually quit jobs to evade their five child support garnishments, falsely claim "exempt" on their federal taxes for 10 years, and draw dicks on their female coworker's gear. And those are just the things they brag about! I'd hate to hear the stories they're ashamed of. You hear a lot of interesting tales working at a staffing agency with a huge construction division.

I love her writing style. Casual as speaking, hilarious and full of inviolable reason. She writes the way I that I feel when words fail me, and sometimes they do. These are the times when I can only close my eyes and put my arms in the air in a sort of primitive gesture of distress.

"Hoochie Beach" is my favorite.

Friday, September 16, 2011

Creepy Laura

Another Oddities referral.

I love Laura, the mortician/clothing designer/model. Unabashedly, delightfully weird.



Can't find one without the ad.

Relaxing on her cooling table in a dress of her own design.

www.lauraflook.net

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Weird Arizona Highways commemorative video, I guess very early 80s. Ever-fantastical, magical!



Interesting for the Goldwater photography stories. Although Dolan Ellis really, really makes me want to kill myself. I had a weird flashback of 80s/90s Nickelodeon and that Fred Penner show. Terrible!

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Stay a while


I found myself trapped alone in here for a while today. It's a lovely 1901 bungalow with apparent Amityville tendencies. Right now it contains an exhibit about the restoration of a nearby Victorian and is full of strange and random items found in and under the house, like books and letters and bottles under the porch and 100 year old broken kitchen implements from under the ground floor.

The very average key lock turns smoothly from the outside, but once you are in, you are in. I spent about five long minutes jiggling, turning, and struggling before moving to the back door which was even more immobile than the front. So I just stood in the hall for a while, wondering what to do, my fingers sore from the repetition of trying to turn a key in a lock that had somehow been re-keyed in the last 20 minutes. After trying the front door again, getting nothing, and stamping and screaming REALLY?!?!?, the lock clicked over.

Sunday, September 11, 2011

George Harrison HBO film



The trailer is a little too "...In a WORLD" - Does GH really require a Hollywood intro? Well, you know what I say. It'll be on 10/5 and 10/6.

Pulp got back together.

For a minute, a few months ago.

Not sure if I've mentioned how I love Jarvis, but I do. In fact, I like him more the older and rougher he gets. The voice somehow gets sexier*, the appearance is no longer that of a very tall, very young girl, so I guess he is still peaking. Seems like he can't hit certain high notes anymore. That's ok, JVC. ilu.



His weekly radio show: Jarvis' Sunday Service

* i just need to point out that i hate the word "sexy" - one of my least favorite adjectives and oh hell no is it ever a noun. but i'm beat! i got nothing! there's no other word for it. aiight get out of here, this never happened.

Monday, September 5, 2011

Camping this weekend was fun, and ridiculous. I need to make a note to not wander aimlessly in the woods by myself (this time the phone could not have helped me) but I survived yet again.

I lost my fucking mind staring at the stars in a clearing at midnight. I can't remember having seen them so clearly ever in my life, and it was the most amazing thing. I couldn't even take it all in. There were too many places to look. Lost my fucking MIND.

Being "in nature" is always very thrilling for me and I turn into a very excited child, perhaps one at Disneyland. Screaming and carrying on when I see animals. etc.


One day I'll use one of the cameras collecting dust in drawers and on shelves instead of my phone.

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Tell it

Shattering historical misunderstandings one comic at a time. Hark, a Vagrant. Damn it Kate Beaton! I want to draw comics, too. But I fear I'd just end up accidentally ripping HAV. Maybe I'll just draw alternately mean and flattering caricatures of my favorite characters. Then embroider them onto linen. NEW LIFE CALLING, toss that in with the 15 others.


Poor NPBP.

I saw a bald eagle!

(not pictured)